Oscar Buddy, I Miss You Every Day

A year ago today, Felix and I said good-bye to our dear friend Oscar.

I still think of him every time I take a shower.  In fact, that's usually when I miss him most.

Wednesday Weigh-In

This week I lost 0.8 pounds, bringing my total since I decided to start tracking to 4.2 pounds lost.  It's not bad since I stopped working out about a month ago when I got the MR arthrogram (aka: the big-ass needle in my hip with the crap injected into my joint) and then started physiotherapy soon thereafter.  Although some would say that physio is like working out, so there you go.

Most of mine has been through eating better, except this past week, which has been stress eating, which is to say "Not eating much at all, except weird food combos."  (Don't ask.)

I was going to lighten things up today and show off something I knitted recently, but since tomorrow is recipe day and Friday is list day, I'll give one more update today, show off my knitting Saturday, and give an update on Sunday.  (That's the plan, anyway, barring some unforeseen event between now and then.)

Today, as planned, I worked on my bedroom.  I focused on the storage boxes under my bed.  I condensed four storages boxes down to two, which may not be as impressive as it sounds since the two that are empty are the smaller ones (about 2/3rds the size of the larger ones).  I filled a bag for recycling, I filled a bag for shredding, and I have a smallish-sized box of things that can be donated or are ready for a potential yard sale.

The bookshelf in my bedroom has three shelves of books that are ALL books I've been trying to get rid of.  So if I have this yard sale, they will all be on the lawn.  So that's done.  Next up is the closest and weeding through clothes.  I don't know if I have energy for that today, since today was kind of emotional.  The stuff under the bed was mostly pictures and newspapers and magazines of EVENTS.

At point I just burst out laughing (Ria and Diana will probably be the only ones who get this).  I'm picking out newspapers and magazines one by one to see if there are any I can part with.  John Ritter's death.  Christopher Reeve's death.  George Brett's retirement.  Wayne Gretzky's retirement.  Obama's win.  Johnny Cash's death.  John-John Kennedy's death.  Papers from September 12 and 13th.  Clint Bowyer and Greg Biffle win at Kansas Speedway - wait, WHAT?  Yeah, recycle.

I also discovered a lot of pictures.  You remember back when we took our film to CVS or Eckerd and got it developed?  Yeah, pictures.  Felix when he was a little kitten, looking terrified of everything.  Oscar drinking out of a cup on the coffee table.  New Dog sleeping with his hedgehog on my bed in Missouri.  Mom's wedding and reception.  A friend's wedding I went to in Boston.  The boy I nannied for in Missouri, who passed away from Huntington's Disease when he was 10 years old.

I'm glad I had duplicates, because I set aside some pictures to mail to some folks.  I think they will be pleased to get them.  As much as I like digital cameras (and, yes, I know I can print off the pics), it was fun to flip through all these and laugh and cry.

State of the Min

The Summer of 2010 has been, well, interesting.

I want to thank everyone for being so supportive while I was mourning the loss of The Ocs. Every once in awhile, at the most unexpected times, I get hit with grief. Like when Med Student (who some of you know as Rachel) and I were eating at the local Vietnamese restaurant and she mentioned that she wished she had been able to have gone to free Goo Goo Dolls concert as part of Philadelphia's Welcome America (Fourth of July) celebration. I burst in tears, and she was like, "What happened? What's going on? What just happened?" When I finally stopped crying, I explained that I had also wanted to go, but that was Oscar's last night with us. And we just sat there, in the middle of the restaurant, holding hands for awhile.

Or the other day when I was talking to Ria and I mentioned my cats. And then I realised that I don't have cats, plural, anymore. And then I called my mom and cried.

I believe I emailed everyone who left a message for me on the blog who also left their email address, and I received a lot of messages on Ravelry that I believe I've also returned, as well. When I started modding the Free Pattern Testers group, I never realised that I'd meet such caring people with so many of their own stories to share, too!

I've also got another really frustrating situation going on right now which has my life in extreme limbo. Some of you know about it, especially local friends. But when I have definitive answers and know the implications of what's going on, I'll spill all.

In other news, I had my regular three-month check-in with my doctor last week. I'm still low in Vitamin D, so she switched me from 3,000 IUs a day to 50,000 IUs a week. And since I've been having very minor right upper-quadrant pain again (very similar to what I was having two years ago when the gall-bladder in-and-out of the hospital fiasco began), she did a bunch of blood tests and gave me an ultrasound order in case the pain gets worse, and I can decide whether I want to go in for the test. If the pain continues, I can make an appointment with my GI specialist, and I'll have the baseline pancreatic enzyme levels and U/S results for him to see.

She's also sending me to an orthopaedic specialist for my torn hip cartilage to get a second opinion since neither of us are particularly pleased with the progress I've been making with the PM&R guy I've been seeing. But first I need to see him one more time to get my MRI results back, my records, etc. And of course, he's on vacation for the next two weeks. Yay.

And the latest (which I made some vague references to on Twitter): Those of you who have ever tried to hang out with me in the summer know I'm terrified of hanging out outdoors. It's not that I'm not an outdoors person - it's that I'm allergic to pretty much every bug ever. If a bug looks at me, I'll get a huge-ass welt that will itch until forever. This past Saturday afternoon, I had what I thought was a bug bite kind of between my breast and my underarm. So I did the usual - took an Allegra (an oral antihistamine) and treated topically with Benadryl cream (also an antihistamine). But still I itched... and itched... and itched.

Until Saturday night around 11:00 p.m. when I called Mom pretty freaked out. My entire underarm area, going up to part of my triceps area was covered in what looked like tiny bug bites. Now, usually if I've just scratched a single bug bite a lot, I'll break out in hives, but my hives will be really large, and I know what they look like. And when I take an Allegra and slather on the Benadryl, it'll take the hives. But I'd been doing that all night, to no avail. So I was pretty freaked out. Mom and I went through all the usual suspects - no new foods, no new clothes, I had gone tromping through the woods, etc.

Sunday morning, when I woke up, the area hadn't spread, but it now looked like one huge rash (and when I say huge, I mean it - but I'll get to that in a minute). Instead of tiny bites, it looked as if my cat Felix had taken a fire engine red paint can and spilled it on me overnight. I blame Ria. She's the only person I know who has regular access to paint cans.

To make a long story short (or is it too late?), I spent the weekend not sleeping from the discomfort. I was very tempted to go to the ER - not because I thought my life was in danger, but I was simply that uncomfortable and unable to sleep. But my ER copay is $75 and a doctor visit only costs $10. And it being the weekend, I knew I'd have to sit for hours to see someone in the ER when they'd do the same thing the doctor would do. So I continued with the Allegra, Benadryl, and I threw in an ice pack every once in awhile (but since I only have one ice pack, that only worked every few hours).

I finally saw a doctor Monday afternoon. He measured the rash for my chart, and it was an impressive 6" x 8" (told you it was huge). He gave me a steroid taper, which I'm VERY familiar with, as someone with moderate-level asthma. He also told me to switch to hydrocortisone cream instead of Benadryl (or to alternate) since the Benadryl wasn't being effective for me. And to continue with the ice pack. I told him the biggest problem was just that I was "very uncomfortable," and he laughed a bit wryly and said, "I would imagine, from how red and how large that is, that would be the understatement of the year, my dear."

It's getting a little better every day, but that could just be because Fe got some paint eraser from Ria. I'm not sure. Mostly I'm happy that I can read and knit again. Not being able to use my right arm at all for those few days was a killer. While I'm ambidextrous and could use my left hand to eat and write, not being able to use my arm was interesting. (I had to keep it still because if I held it down, the affected upper arm area rubbed against the underarm area, which hurt. And if I held it out even a little, the skin pulled and stretched, which also hurt.)

So... that's my summer so far. Yay!

In the words of Daria, "Is it fall yet?"

In Memoriam: Oscar

19 February 1996 - 05 July 2010

Last Tuesday, Oscar and I went to the vet, got some steroids, and hoped that he'd start doing better. On Wednesday, we heard that his thyroid levels were too low, adjusted his meds accordingly, and hoped for the best. But he was already doing better, despite refusing the meds. Having been a social worker for "the aging" (aka: old people), I was aware that sometimes sick people (and animals) perk up for a bit right before they die. So even though Ocs started to ambulate better and even though he joined me for a shower, I was afraid to hope. But by Saturday night when he full-out JUMPED onto the love seat, my heart soared. I hugged him tight to my chest, told him I'd missed him, and welcomed him back. Little did I know.

When he woke up Sunday, he stumbled all the way down the hall, ending his trek by falling in the living room. Throughout the day, he got progressively worse. He had a bad fall in the litter box, in which he managed to flip himself over and ended up doing a face-plant in the litter. By the end of the day, he would only eat if I spoon-fed him baby food, and he would drink only if I brought a water bowl to him, and then he drank by putting the right half of his face in the bowl and drank sideways out of his mouth. He was non-responsive to pets or his name being called, and he was unable to walk or even stand by nighttime.

I called Dr. Kurpel first thing Monday morning, and described my boy's personality and symptoms. She said if I felt like it was time to say good-bye, bring him on in, and if she agreed, we could either do it today when I brought him in, or I could take him home to prepare myself and bring him back when I was ready. She then offered to transfer me back to the front desk to make the appointment, or said I could call back when I was ready. I decided I was ready to make the appointment then. I made the appointment for 3:40 p.m. Then I called Naomi and it was decided that she and Anju would accompany me to the vet's office. I asked Naomi to call the vet and get permission for me to bring Ocs in wrapped in his favourite blanket (a NASCAR blanket I won at Kansas Speedway two years ago). First, he couldn't stand or walk, so he wasn't going anywhere. Second, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving with an empty cat crate. They said it was fine.

Jill came over and got some pictures of Oscar. As Jill said, they probably won't capture the spirti of the Ocs, but at least I'll some more pics. We put him on his window perch, and hoped for the best. If any of them come out decent, I'll share them. Then Fe decided he needed to ham it up for the camera, so Jill got some pretty good pics of him, too. I tried to get some food into Ocs, but he refused food all day. Later, when Oscar and I left, I asked Felix if he wanted to tell Oscar good-bye, and I swear to God (and Naomi can verify this), Felix ran over to Oscar and they rubbed noses. No one will EVER be able to convince me that didn't mean something.

When we got to the vet's office, I made eye contact with Zoe (the ever-so-wonderful front desk woman), and I burst into tears. Zoe immediately grabbed a waiting room chair and said, "C'mon, let's get you into an exam room where you can sit down and be with him." Anju and Naomi came in with me, and I let Ocs lie on the exam table on his blanket. Dr. Kurpel saw him, and didn't even bother with all of the normal vitals. She saw him lying there, only his tail flicking back and forth occasionally, and I told her how the last 36 hours had been. She noted that when he comes in, he's usually pretty relaxed, but he was way beyond that. I replied that the only movement from him had been the tail. She said that, unlike with dogs, when cats flick their tails, it's a sign of UNhappiness - in Oscar's case, most likely pain or discomfort. Oh. Why did I feel instantly guilty?

A couple of times, while we were discussing some minor doubts that I had (He was like this last Monday, then he had five good days. What if we don't do this today and he's scheduled for another week of good days?), he tried to lift his head and just couldn't. At one point, he let out a strangled howl. She later told me that cats really only do that when it's their time to go. Their voice changes and gets deep, and it's a voice you only hear when they're about to go. And she said it was when she heard that that she knew it was his time.


She said that if I was still feeling like it was time to say good-bye to him, she completely supported that decision. I said I did feel that way, and I wanted to go ahead and do it today. She explained the procedure, and asked if I wanted to be with him for it. I told her that Oscar had been with me for everything, and I wasn't leaving him now. She asked me if I wanted some more time alone with him before she started, and I said it was okay - I'd been preparing since last week, really. Although she had explained the procedure before, she thoughtfully explained every step again as she did it. After a few minutes, she came back and gave Oscar the first shot to sedate him. She said she'd be back in a few minutes to check on him. At this point, I asked Naomi and Anju to say their good-byes to Oscar, as I wanted to be alone with him in his final moments.

Dr. Kurpel came back in after a few minutes, and started to insert the IV in Oscar's leg, but he wasn't sedated enough. So she gave him another shot, and we waited another few minutes. Finally, it was time. She gave him the IV drugs, and as soon as it was injected, she used her stethoscope to check his heart, nodded, looked at me, and whispered, "He's gone." She said I could stay in the room as long as I wanted to, she could bring my friends back if I wanted to, she gave me some materials on pet bereavement, and she told me I could call her anytime to talk if I needed to.

Then Dr. Kurpel and I had an impromptu little eulogy-esque type of thing for the Ocs. She said that cats sometimes put on a persona when they come in, but she could tell that Oscar was just Oscar - that he was really sweet and charismatic. And she always told him how handsome he was. I told her about the time that Oscar "buried" a dead bird under Mom's couch, and we only found it after we went looking for the thing that had made the house smell REALLY bad for three days. And how he planted his nose right in my ear at night so all I heard was his rather loud purr. And how he takes showers with me, and now showers will never be the same without him.

Before I left, I talked to Dr. Kurpel about Felix. See, Fe and Ocs were best buds. The very first night they were introduced, they were playing together. They actually woke me up that first night, and I thought they were fighting, but they were playing. And they've been pretty inseparable since; they groom each other, they play together, and they sleep together. So I'm worried about how Felix will react to not having his buddy around. She told me to watch his appetite and make sure he's eating. See if he starts hiding out. Monitor changes in behaviour. She said sometimes the surviving cat will take on the traits of the cat who passed. But, either way, just pay a little extra attention to him in the coming days, and call her if I have questions or concerns about the little guy.

We also talked a little bit about how confused I was about how Oscar went downhill so fast, then made this recovery for five days, then took a VERY sudden turn for the worse. She said that cats are especially good at masking pain and discomfort. But seeing at how quickly and aggressively this thing attacked Oscar, her best guess is that he had either a tumour or a cancer of some kind - that it went WAY beyond the thyroid issue, and anything I could have picked up on just from observing him at home. I just shook my head and sighed. Then she repeated her offer to call her anytime to talk to her if I needed to.

Once again, thank you for all of the support I've received throughout the last few weeks. Thank you for sharing your stories with me. Thank you for making me laugh, for the hugs, and most of all... for just listening to me cry on the phone (you know who you are).

Oscar's Vet Visit

As you know, Oscar and I had an appointment with Dr. Kurpel this morning. Last night, I had tucked Ocs in next to me, growing increasingly worried at his glassy, half-closed eyes. He was showing no interest in food or water, and I was pretty sure I knew how the conversation with Dr. Kurpel was going to go. I woke up nearly every hour, and I finally woke up just a few minutes before my alarm was set to go off, and started about my day.

To my surprise, Oscar joined me in the bathroom as I was getting ready to go. He had gotten off the bed by himself and walked down the hall into the bathroom. Now, as background, he almost always comes into the bathroom whenever I'm in there (typical cat - he must know what's going on at all times), but for the past couple of weeks, he's had no interest in anything going on. So this was two good signs - ambulating on his own accord and showing interest in old "hobbies." Then he wandered into the kitchen for some water. Then the trouble started. He tripped over the bathroom scale in the hallway. He stumbled in the living room. After he drank some water, he couldn't turn around (whether from sheer exhaustion or inability to manoeuvre, I don't know), so he just laid down in front of the water (which had the bonus of pissing Felix off). But his eyes were no longer glassy - they were wide and alert. He was holding his head up better (although it was still shaky), and he seemed generally perked up.

So, to the vet we went. And, this is when I want to sing the praises (not literally, because that would offensive to your ears) of Naomi who graciously put her day on hold to accompany Ocs and me to the vet today.

Dr. Kurpel checked out his vitals and checked his leg reflexes. She also watched him walk a little bit. He still stumbles when he walks, and he often splays his hind legs out, as if he can't hold them under him properly. She also noticed the same thing that I had with regard to his front leg also starting to get a little wonky. His right front leg is showing some weakness (but I'm wondering if that's because he's using his front legs to compensate for his hind legs), and he's been crossing his front legs when he walks. We discussed next steps. The options she laid out were to go see a neurologist, who she said probably wouldn't be able to tell a whole lot without doing testing such as MRIs, CAT scans, etc., which would involve sedation (read: much expense). And, of course, that would lead to findings, which would lead to, "So, here's what we can do about that." Which leads to more decisions, more procedures, etc. So, basically, it's a whole path I'd be taking Ocs down.

I told her that I'd given it a LOT of thought last night, discussed it with Wise Women (read: Mom and Ria) and decided that it just didn't make sense for a 14-year-old cat who has lived a long, full life and already has chronic health issues (thyroid disease and suspected arthritis). Plus, as Naomi mentioned, with an older cat, the anaesthesia alone is already an increased risk. And, as we all know, with an animal, you can't just explain to them that they're being poked and prodded for a reason and it's all to make them feel better. So, with all of that in mind, I felt pretty strongly against the neuro option.

She said she thought that actually made a lot of sense, and that she would make the same decision for her cat at home, given the circumstances. I felt SO relieved. I said, "Oh good! I was so worried I would leave and you'd talk about me to the other people here, like 'Man, I thought she was worried about her cat!'" She said, "Uh, you've MET me, right?" She said that she'd just told me about the neurologists at Penn because it's her responsibility to tell me about all of my options and let me make an informed decision. So, on to Option #2.

So said Ocs might have some kind of inflammation that could be causing all of this, so we could try a oral steroids. We discussed what the possible side effects of the steroids are, what could happen if we just do nothing, if the goal here is that the steroids help him or just make him not get worse (we're hoping for the former, but we'll settle for the latter), etc. If the steroids work, this will be another medication that he'll be on chronically. If not, we'll need to figure out what to do next.

She and I discussed quality of life indicators. Today, things for him are good. But yesterday and Sunday, they definitely weren't. (Oh, and I learned that purring doesn't equate contentedness. Sometimes, a purr can be a "pain purr.") The plan for now is that I will check in with Dr. Kurpel on Saturday, but sooner than that if Oscar takes a bad turn again.

Once again, I can't thank everyone enough for all the hugs, prayers, and thoughts you've sent our way. It means so much to me that you've been supporting Oscar, Felix, and me through all of this.

Oscar Update, Part II

I just called the vet and spoke to her because despite what seemed like some good signs yesterday, Oscar was showing some not-so-good signs today. First the good news: I did NOT have to make A Big Decision today.

Now, the rest of the update:

Yesterday, we walked through the house (largely unprompted) - still swaying and stumbling, but not as much - and then used the litter box all by himself. This seemed encouraging as I had been having to helping in and out of the box.

Then, this morning, he fell getting into his box. And he stayed in his splayed out position until I ran across the room to help him. After that, he has pretty much refused to try to walk at all. At one point, I got him off the of bed and put him on the floor to try to get him to drink some water, and he wouldn't even try to stand up; he just immediately laid down. I picked him up again, and, again, he made no effort to try to find his footing. The third time, he tried and stood for a few seconds until his legs started to give, then laid back down. Okay, fine, message delivered. I brought the water bowl to him.

I also noticed today that one of his front legs seems like it is also starting to act a little gimpy, which is troublesome. This is what prompted the phone call to Dr. Kurpel. I don't like new symptoms! When she called, she asked how I was, I said I was fine; I asked how she was, and she said she was good. Then she asked how Oscar was doing, which is when I just burst into tears. I said, "I actually don't know, which is why I'm calling you." I explained that it seemed like he was doing worse, then better, and now worse again.

We talked about his symptoms, including his ever-increasing lethargy, and she suggested that I see a neurologist at Penn's Vet School, if I thought he was stable. If not, I should take him to the ER. A third option was that I could bring him back there and she could do a regular exam to make sure that everything that she could check was fine, as far as heart rate, lungs, blood pressure, temperature, etc. If anything there was funky, that would at least save me a trip to a specialist. I decided to do that first thing in the morning, and we'll discuss options from there.

I'm hesitant about going the specialist route since - honestly (and not to be mean, but...) I don't have a lot of money. I'm unemployed right now, and we're talking about a 14-year-old cat. A 14-year-old cat who I love dearly, but who already has thyroid disease. So I also want to talk to Dr. Kurpel about what kinds of things, in her non-specialist opinion, does she think we could be talking about.

I also want to thank everyone who has been really supportive to Oscar, Felix, and me throughout the past several days.

Oscar Update

Those of you who follow me on Twitter know that Oscar has been ill again.

We went to see the wonderfully awesome Dr. Kurpel on Wednesday because I noticed several days ago that Oscar was having some problems ambulating - he wasn't able to jump up onto the love seat, and was actually having to crawl onto it. I had also taken note that Ocs had missed the last several showers with me, which is not at all like him. In fact, when I can't find him, I'll just start the shower water running, and he'll come running (it's a handy trick). He seemed generally lethargic, but I had written that off to the hot weather; I mean, I wasn't really going out of my way to run up and down the hallway, either, you know? But when he started stumbling around my apartment like a drunken sailor, it was time to call the vet.

And they said, "Bring him in TODAY." Okey doke.

I took him in later that afternoon and Dr. Kurpel said she didn't think it was a stroke (because I didn't report Ocs seeming disoriented or tilting his head a lot), but she did suspect a vascular event of some sort. She said it can be a side effect of the thyroid medication that Oscar is on for blood clots to form, and if he has a blood clot, it could be making its way through his spinal cord. And if it is a blood clot, it should make its way through his system and clear up. She said that has seen cats before brought in with complete hind leg paralysis due to the thyroid meds, and she said that once it gets to that point, that only thing that can be done is to put the cats to sleep. I asked her what kinds of warning signs to look for, and she said not to worry, because if that was going to happen to Oscar, it would have already happened. Whew.

HOWEVER, if Oscar isn't ambulating well in the next few days, pretty much the only other thing to do would be MRIs and CAT scans to look for brain lesions and spinal cord lesions, which would run over a thousand dollars. She thoughtfully remembered that I was unemployed the last time we met and asked if I was working yet. I told her no. She was very honest in telling me that even if we did those tests and found something, there's only so much that could be done and even THEN, there would have to be discussions about the likelihood of success of those surgeries, quality of life after, etc.

While we were there, we did his routine thyroid blood draw, which includes kidney and liver function tests. She also checked his blood pressure and did a blood sugar test to check for diabetes. Sugars and blood pressure were great. She called me the next day to let me know that everything with his kidneys and liver looked great, and his white cell count was SLIGHTLY elevated, but it was so slight that she wasn't worried about it. However, his thyroid level is now too low (he's been too high all this time). She said she's seen it happen before in one cat that she treated where the hind legs get locked up due to hypothyroidism, so that could also be contributing to the problem. So we adjusted the meds that day. I'm to call her early next week (which is now in just a few days), and let her know if Ocs is doing any better. From there, we'll make any decisions we need to make. *gulp*

Yesterday... was not good. Oscar was unable to sit properly to eat or drink. After he ate a little, he tried to walk about five feet and fell over. I burst into tears and went over to pet him, only to find that he was purring away - at least one of us was happy. Last night, I moved the food and water into my bedroom (where the litter boxes are) so Ocs wouldn't have to leave.

Mostly, I'm spending a lot of time this weekend holding and petting Oscar - hoping for the best, steeling myself for the worst.

In the meantime, enjoy this picture Oscar making himself comfortable with my friend Rachel (who Ria knows better as Med Student):

General Update

Got calls from two doctors yesterday: Oscar and Felix's doctor, and my hip doctor.

My hip doctor said that he had "the best doctor in this field in the country" read my MRI (the head of musculoskeletal medicine at Thomas Jefferson University Hospital), and it ends up that I have a labral tear in my hip. This means that I have a tear in a cartilage of the part of the hip that holds my hip in the socket. He said this accounts for all of my pain and the loss of range of motion. His plan of action is physical therapy. If that doesn't work, then steroid injections. If that doesn't work, "we'll discuss it further at that time."

Oscar and Felix's doctor called after that. She asked how things were going, and I said, "Well... they're interesting." She laughed, and said, "I don't know if I like that answer. (pause) Do I?" I told her that I'd put Feliway in the bedroom (since the directions had said to put it in the room where the troublemaker spends the most time). But on Day One, he had NEVER left the room. Except to eat and drink. Other than that, Ocs and I NEVER saw him. Which, on one hand, means we weren't being attacked, but on the other hand, it kind of isn't the point that we become two separate households.

Day Two saw Felix venturing out a bit more, but when he was in the living room with Ocs and me, he did try to nip me when I touched his leg. So, that was awesome. But, of course, being the highly-skilled (ha ha) epidemiologist that I am, I know that a two-day observation is not really conclusive of anything. So, we'll see. Dr. Kurpel assured me that she is still more than willing to put him on kitty Prozac, especially since Fe has always been highly anxious and skittish, even before this aggression started.

As for Oscar, he's on the high end of normal, so we're adjusting his meds again, and I'm continuing to monitor his symptoms at home. Watch his stools, his rate of puking, his energy level, his socialisation, etc.

My next week will be spent packing (I leave on Thursday, but my Mom and Dale are leaving on Sunday since they are driving to North Carolina - they had planned on stopping by Nashville, but are now coming up with Plan B), cleaning house (I LOVE coming home to a clean house), and generally making sure everything is in order for being away for two weeks (bills are paid, etc.).

Cat Update

Ocs went for his follow-up appointment on Tuesday. Nothing new, just bloodwork to make sure things with his thyroid are moving in the right direction.

But I did have to talk to Dr. Kurpel about Felix. Ah, Felix. Felix continues to be an aggressive little bugger. On Sunday, while I was TRYING to wish my mom a happy happy Mother's Day, Fe decided to attack me. He was on the counter and I deigned to walked by him, and he decided it would be a great idea to "scratch" my eye. Now, I put that in quotation marks because he doesn't actually have his claws. Sometimes I feel bad about it, but on Sunday I was actually really happy about it because despite not having claws he still managed to hurt my eye. So I swatted him, he hissed, bared his teeth, used both paws to grab my arm and tried to bite me. So now I'm on the phone with Mom and I start crying - more out of shock and being startled/scared than anything else.

About ten minutes later, I'm still on the phone with her, and Ocs is sitting in the kitchen and Fe walks right by Ocs and just smacks the ever-loving crap out of poor Oscar! I was watching the whole thing - Oscar was literally just sitting there looking into the living room and Fe walked by, hissed, reared back, and walloped him.

Mom told me to put Fe in jail, so I did, and I decided that when I took Oscar in to see Dr. Kurpel, I would talk to her about Fe's aggressive behaviour not getting any better and, in fact, getting a bit worse. Mom thinks this is because I have befriended a cat who is up for adoption at Baltimore Pet Shoppe (local friends in need of a cat - adopt Speedy!).

I talked to Dr. Kurpel, and she recommended that I try Feliway, a cat pheromone diffuser since I'm going away next week for two weeks. Although Felix knows (quite well) the two people who will be cat-sitting, it will still be a change in the schedule, and if the Feliway is going to work, we want it to start working now. If it doesn't work, she wants to do a blood panel on him just to make sure that he doesn't have some underlying kidney, liver, etc., issue that's causing him physical discomfort that makes him act out aggressively. If it isn't physical, then we're going to put him on Prozac. This will mean checking his liver enzymes every once in awhile (blood work on both cats - yay!), but at least I won't have a cat who is attacking my other cat.

My main concern was that Fe happy and not attacking Ocs and that I not be scared to have friends touch Felix, and Dr. Kurpel's concern was that I be happy cat owner. By the time I got home, she had emailed some links with information on cat behaviour, and some information on cat behavioural specialists at Penn Vet (yeah, cause that sounds affordable), but said she would be happy to work with me if that didn't seem like something I wanted to do (whew).

I got the Feliway yesterday, along with a new cat toy for Felix (and I MAY have played with Speedy for awhile while I was at the Pet Shoppe anyway).

Wish us luck!

Breathing again

Sorry I've been so quiet lately.

Last week, JUST as I was getting my essay wrapped up I called the admissions people just to make sure I would be DONE. Nope. They also needed a writing sample. WHAT? Yeah, a writing sample. Anything that was 5-30 pages would do. It could be anything that had been submitted while I did my Master's work. Okaaaaay. Deep breath.

I decided to just turn in my thesis. Then I decided on a paper I'd turned in for Dennis because I remembered that I had a paper he said he was going to keep as a sample of how to do that assignment. Then I dug it out and realised that the reason he said that was because I'd done the final exam as an outline and he thought it was creative and original and I'd thought outside the box. And if one didn't have the final exam question, the outline really made NO sense. Then I found another paper in the file I'd kept because he'd really liked it. So I decided to use that. Except it was too short. So I decided to turn it into a longer paper.

Then I went out with my friend Rachel to celebrate her birthday. And I caught her up on the Application Debacle. At this point, it's Thursday evening, and the application is due Monday morning. She felt that I should NOT turn in the Dennis paper and that I should turn in my thesis. She was pretty convincing. So I went home, called Mom, discussed it with her (for the THIRD time), woke up on Friday, and sent in my thesis.

DONE.

In the meantime, I've had two doctor appointments and both of my cats have had doctor appointments. They no longer think that I have early onset osteoarthritis of my pelvic joint; the new theory is that I somehow managed to tear my hip labrum (the cartilage on the socket part of the ball-and-socket of the hip joint).

My new PCP (who isn't really all that new since she filled in when my former PCP was sick or on maternity leave or otherwise unavailable) saw me for the first time and we had a great visit. I caught her up on my endo and GI appointments from last month, and the 6-day migraine I had a few weeks ago. She's referred me to someone for that since my former neurologist retired and I haven't found someone since who I like as much as that guy. The nurse practitioner I saw last time wanted me to schedule a physical, but the PCP said she doesn't think it's necessary since her plan is to see me every 3-4 months anyway, and she'll continue to coordinate my specialists, just as Mira did. And my next visit, we get to talk about My First Mammogram. Even though I'm young, since I also don't know my family medical history, she wants me to think about it.

As for the boys... Felix is healthy and Dr. Kurpel was impressed with how healthy his teeth are. We talked a lot about his increasingly aggressive behaviour (both toward me and Ocs), and she was really helpful and understanding, and she gave me a lot of tips on how to deal with him. As for Ocs, his thyroid levels are looking great and we've adjusted his meds slightly. But his new labs showed that he's slightly anemic, which his last month's labs didn't show, so we now need to keep an eye on that, too.

I also talked to Dr. Kurpel about how difficult it is to pill Ocs and how he hates Greenies Pill Pockets, and it doesn't help that I have NO idea what table foods he likes since I don't give them table food. I did figure out that he likes Velveeta, but that wore off in two weeks. Now I'm getting away with dipping the Velveeta in his canned food gravy first, but I can tell the novelty of that is wearing thin, too. So I asked her (pre-emptively) what to try next (cause I bought some hot dogs and he was NOT interested in those). She suggested trying beef or chicken baby food and grinding the pills in that, so we'll be trying that next. Pilling twice a day is getting to be not so much with the fun. Wish us luck!

VCA Cat Hospital in Philadelphia

Those of you who know me well know that I spend some time writing Angry Letters and making phone calls when companies piss me off. NBC has received two letters during the Olympics coverage (one during the Opening Ceremonies - they didn't make it very far before Bob Costas pissed me off). FOX got more than one call from me earlier this month for showing me snow instead of Daytona qualifying. So, to even out the balance, when someone is awesome, I want people to know that, too.

I need to sing the praises once again of the VCA Cat Hospital in Philadelphia; they are the wonderful, compassionate people who have been helping me take care of the Ocs (this is pronounced like "ox," by the way) for the past week and a half. Specifically, Oscar's doctor is Dr. Katherine Kurpel, about whom I can not say enough good things.

When Dr. Kurpel initially saw Ocs, she wasn't sure what was wrong with him, so she gave me an estimate for several tests. I explained that I had JUST been laid-off and asked her if she could help me prioritise what tests would be more urgent, would make more sense, etc. She was extremely understanding and compassionate about this, especially when I started crying that if I HAD the $600 I would pay for all the tests she was proposing, but I just DIDN'T. She didn't guilt trip me about it at all. To the contrary, she said something (it's all kind of a blur now) about when you have rent and food to pay for, of course you have to prioritise, and everyone can understand that. She talked to me about whether Ocs was the kind of cat who eats foreign objects or chews on toys that he shouldn't, etc., and when I said that he really doesn't at all, she decided to scrap the abdominal x-ray. We whittled a few other things down and got the estimate down to about half of the original.

That all happened on Saturday. She called me on Monday with the blood test results, even though she was on travelling on her vacation. She called her office and left special instructions with them so I could go in and pick up Ocs' meds, some special food, and talk to the other doctor if I thought of any other questions (which I, of course, did). She called me the next day to check on Oscar again because she knew he wasn't eating well, and that impressed me.

But what REALLY impressed me was today. I got another call from the office today. At first, I assumed that it was to remind me that I needed to bring Ocs in for his follow-up blood work testing in 3-4 weeks (well, now 2-3 weeks) to make sure his thyroid meds are at the right level. And I thought, "Yes, yes, I know." But, I was wrong. They just wanted to know how he was doing. Was he still having diarhhea? Was he eating any better? How was the dehydration? How about the behaviour? Was he more himself yet? In fact, I'M the one who had to ask about the follow-up appointment as we were hanging up!

I really, really can not say enough about how much I love this place. I've decided to make Dr. Kurpel the boys' regular doctor. As much as I love The Cat Doctor and Dr. Eigner, I was SO impressed by this office (who, as you may remember was recommended by Dr. Eigner's office), that I'm sticking with them permanently.

Happy 14th Birthday, Oscar!

About 13 years and 10 months ago, I went to pick out a kitten from a co-worker's sister's litter. That night, I brought a tiny all-black kitten home to two very suspicious dogs - Max and Nicky (who have been since gone over the Rainbow Bridge).

It took us a few days before we hit on a name that was Just Right, but Oscar it was. Somehow, throughout the years, I started calling him Ocsar Boxer, which sometimes gets shortened to Ocsar, and mostly gets shortened to Ocs.

When Ocs was two we almost had to amputate one of his legs, but thanks to nearly daily visits with a dedicated veterinarian in Missouri, we were able to save his leg. He had gotten his leg wedged between a chain link fence and a wooden privacy fence and was found hanging upside-down by his leg. To this day if he's walking on a non-carpeted surface, you can hear him coming because it sounds like he's walking on a peg leg; the leg he got caught "clicks" when he moves it.

Oscar has also flown on an airplane (as carry-on - no cargo for this baby!). And he made the transition from being an indoor/outdoor Missouri cat to an indoor Philadelphia cat. But in his heyday, boy could he hunt! Rabbits and birds and squirrels and anything else he could get from the park across the street.

The Ocs and I would like to thank everyone who has given us so much support and love over the past week while he was recovering. We appreciate it very much, especially since there were moments when we weren't sure that we'd make it to today. Hugs to you all, especially to your pets who sent licks, skritches, cuddles, etc.

A Pet Peeve: Literally

My friends know that one of my biggest pet peeves is when people misuse the word "literally."

One time I heard a woman say, "It's literally raining cats and dogs outside!" Uh, no, it's really NOT, ma'am. Cause PETA would be all over that shit.

In the aftermath of September 11th, the news aired a "man on the street" interview in which the person said, "I really feel for President Bush. He literally has the weight of the world on his shoulders." I called my sister who said EXACTLY what I yelled at the tv: Who is he - Atlas???

But I would hope that Olympic sportscasters and colour commentators would know a little better than the average person. But, apparently, that's a bit much for which to hope.

On Saturday, I was informed that one of the U.S.A. speed skaters "literally had a wall of Korean skaters" to get through. I turned to Naomi (who was watching The Games with me) and asked her if that wasn't perhaps against the IOC rules. We then wondered if the Koreans would be building this wall after the race started, if the wall would move around the track with the skaters, and why other countries wouldn't employ this strategy.

And just tonight, I was told that one of the downhill skiers "literally let it all out." Dear God, I hope not. First of all, it's bloody cold on those ski slopes in Vancouver. Secondly, doesn't she need some of that, you know, IN her?

Also, the Oscar update:

The Ocs is doing well. He continues to make urine and today he actually made a tiny little poop! I've never been so excited in my life to see poop! He's still somewhat listless, but he's ambled through the living room a few times on his way into the kitchen for water, and then back under the bed.

Finally, a couple of pics of Felix because he deserves some blog space:

The Oscar Update

Ocs' doctor called today and said that his blood work shows that he has hyperthyroidism. Way to go, buddy, for following in mommy's footsteps. You couldn't have just decided to be a Raider's fan? Or like Scott Speed? No? Okay, then. So, two pills a day for the little buddy, at least for now.

But, in the meantime: He still has the diarhhea, and I'm very sorry to report that he is still not quite making it to the litter box every time (no, really, you don't know how sorry I am to say that to you). And the vet was extremely alarmed today to hear that nearly 48 hours after I started a 5.5-ounce can of wet cat food, Oscar still has yet to make his way through the entire can. So she had me try a different try kind of food. We had been trying Hill's Prescription Diet i/d, and now we're trying then e/n. Each can costs nearly $2/can so I'm hoping we hit on a winning combination quickly. Not to sound crass, but the unemployed don't have money to burn, especially when Saturday's vet trip used a good chunk of the savings account.

But it's not all bad news: This morning Ocs went and voluntarily drank some water for the first time in over 60 hours! AND he kept it down! I didn't let him have very much for fear he'd overdo it and then bring it up just because he would have too much, but I'm happy he finally showed interest in water at all. But since then, when I've offered him water, he's not been interested. I have been adding small amounts of water to his wet food to sneak him extra water (thanks, Brook!), though. And I've been forcing (God, I sound like a horrible shrew) small medicine droppers-full of sugar water down him every so often.

So: still with the diarhhea, still slightly dehydrated, not getting enough food, but showing a slight interest in water once. And a diagnosis of hyperthyroid.

And just to remind you of the handsome fellow we're talking about:














Also, Felix was doing a really good job of leaving Ocs alone until today. But this morning, Fe ran up to Ocs and swiped at him. I thought maybe Fe was trying to play with him so I just separated them and reminded Fe that Ocs didn't feel good and left Ocs under the bed by himself. But just awhile ago, Fe ran up to Ocs and batted at him again and hissed. I don't know what to do; ideas?

Oscar

My Oscar is sick.

Yesterday morning, he threw up, but I didn't think much of it. Anyone who has cats (and some who don't) know that cats just sometimes ick up. But then he did it again. And again. He wasn't able to keep down water.

Then, in the afternoon, his stool came out completely liquid - mucous-y and bloody. And a few hours later, it happened again. My wonderful friend Brook immediately set to work Googling what she could about cat diarrhea.

And this whole time, Ocs (as I call him) was hunkered down under the bed between some boxes. For me to even see him, I had to move boxes around. For those of you who have met this love bug, you know that this is VERY un-Ocs-like behaviour. For those of you who have not met him, imagine if House, M.D., suddenly began treating his patients with better bedside manner than Wilson does. Or if Simon Cowell went three weeks in a row without saying some variation of "I don't mean to be rude, but..." Or if the NASCAR media went 48 hours without mentioning the "D-word" (and I don't mean "damn").

I called The Cat Doctor today, whom I adore, but they were overbooked because of this past week's snow cancellations and such. I asked them to refer me somewhere, and they suggested either VCA Cat Hospital or Girard Veterinary Clinic; however, only VCA is open on Saturdays. Fortunately they had some open appointments. Given Ocs' age (he'll be 14 this coming Friday) and symptoms, they suggested I have him seen right away. Which is when I started crying. Right on the phone with the poor woman. Embarrassing.

Another wonderful friend of mine, Naomi, rented a car to come pick Ocs and me up because I didn't think I was in any condition to drive by then. Ocs got examined and, just like a car at the mechanic, he started to act more himself, wanting skritches, licking my face, etc. The vet couldn't even listen to his heart because he wouldn't stop purring! I told her good luck with that because he ALWAYS purrs.

In the end, we got sent home with a prescription for an anti-diarrheal if it's still happening tomorrow, and directions to give 2.5 mg of OTC Pepcid AC once a day. They gave him fluids sub-cutaneously since he was slightly dehydrated. They took some blood tests, and the results should be back on Monday, or Tuesday at the latest. If the blood work doesn't show anything, though, she wants to discuss x-rays, urinalysis, and hospitalisation.

He didn't eat at all yesterday, so tonight, she wants me to try to interest him in one tablespoon of wet food. If he keeps that down, I'm to keep trying 1-2 tablespoons of wet food frequently, as he can tolerate it. Wish us luck!

Oh, and for anyone who hasn't yet met the wonder known as Oscar - one pic of him trying to occupy my knitting bag, and one pic of him keeping the inside of a bag safe from enemy invaders (he really is in there!):